Post by Marc Mears on Jul 6, 2004 22:49:50 GMT
HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION BULLETIN
MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET
“WOMAN” – A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS
Element: Woman.
Symbol: Wo.
Discoverer: Adam.
Atomic Mass: Accepted as 53.6kg but may vary from 40kg to 200kg.
Occurrence: Copious quantities in all urban areas.
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered with painted film.
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6. Yields to pressure applied to correct points.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning or for no known reason.
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
COMMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in a sports car.
2. Can be a great aid in relaxation.
3. Vary effective cleaning agent.
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state.
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.
POTENTIAL HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands>
2. Illegal to posses more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other.
MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET
“WOMAN” – A CHEMICAL ANALYSIS
Element: Woman.
Symbol: Wo.
Discoverer: Adam.
Atomic Mass: Accepted as 53.6kg but may vary from 40kg to 200kg.
Occurrence: Copious quantities in all urban areas.
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered with painted film.
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6. Yields to pressure applied to correct points.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning or for no known reason.
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
COMMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in a sports car.
2. Can be a great aid in relaxation.
3. Vary effective cleaning agent.
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state.
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.
POTENTIAL HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands>
2. Illegal to posses more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other.